Some Observations from a former Homeschooling Mom

I’m taking a short break from my Behind the Scenes posts to address a topic that may be facing more people today than we ever expected it would.

Many years ago (where does the time go?), our sons attended private Christian schools. But there came a day when tuition costs prevented us from continuing and the public schools in our area were not our first choice. We knew people who homeschooled, but had always tossed the idea aside as ridiculous for us.

Until it wasn’t.

When faced with reasons we didn’t expect—in our case tuition hikes—in our current world a lot of rigid restrictions—parents have some tough choices to make. I’d like to share a few thoughts on those possible choices.

First, let me say that there is no one-size-fits-all choice when it comes to teaching our kids. That was part of the problem we faced in the Christian school. Our kids learned in different ways, at different paces, and an organized classroom of even 20-25 (and that’s small in comparison to some public schools) is more than one teacher can teach individually. It’s just not possible.

My comments for or against homeschooling are also not meant to praise or condemn. We have at least two public school teachers in our family and my husband substitute teaches at the local junior high school. So just because we homeschooled our boys for twelve years doesn’t mean this is the only right option.

What I’m seeing now, however, is a society that is plagued with fear of a virus that may or may not be as harmful to children as we think. This virus may or may not have viable solutions. It’s the not knowing for sure—the not knowing who or what to believe—that has leaders making impossible guidelines for schools this coming fall.

Some are saying online school only. Others say send them every other day or every other week. Take every child’s temperature before they can enter school. Practice social distancing and make kids K-12 wear masks the entire day. Don’t eat together or socialize, just sit in your socially distanced space and learn.

Um…are they serious? Forgive my skepticism, but I have to wonder if people making up these rules have ever walked into a classroom of junior high kids or elementary students. I think maybe herding cats would be easier.

Worse, such rigid guidelines make school feel like prison. I don’t know about you, but I can’t wear a mask for very long. It causes me all sorts of problems. I do it to make other people feel safer, but to wear one all day? I know I couldn’t. If I worked outside of my house and had those restrictions at my job, I’d have to ask for some other way to work.

If I, as an adult, can’t breathe well in the typical mask after 30-40 minutes, do we really think children will learn wearing them all day?

But that aside, let’s consider online schooling. Why is this a bad idea unless you are a college student?

1. Teachers cannot force their students to tune into the class. (We know teachers who faced this problem during the last three months of this past school year when in-person learning was shut down.)
2. Kids are not motivated to learn over Zoom or some other online platform unless they have a parent insisting they listen and complete the work.
3. Not all parents can help their kids. Take my multi-ethnic neighborhood as an example. If the parent doesn’t speak English, they aren’t going to understand what the teacher is saying to their child. It’s pretty hard to enforce something you don’t understand.
4. Teachers are not trained to teach online, so they are faced with more than they should have to be and probably won’t be compensated well enough for such a task.
5. Any extra curricular classes like art, music, wood shop, or anything hands on would have no way to be done outside of a classroom, especially those that use specific tools—like a bandsaw in wood shop.
6. Parents might speak English but they might also have jobs and can’t be home with their kids all day to make sure they are going online. What happens to one parent households? Who pays for babysitting? Will the babysitter enforce the kids to do their school work?

These are just a few things that come to mind for online schooling, so let’s look at in classroom every-other-day or every-other-week schooling.

1. Kids that don’t have a regular consistent education are going to forget what they learned.
2. Education builds on itself, but if you miss school for a week because it’s the other kids’ turn to go to school, teachers will have to spend time going over old material before moving on. Kind of what I said above, but this is a big deal.
3. Kids don’t understand why they could go to school last week but not this week. I wonder what psychologists are going to say about this when the consequences come out years from now.

I taught piano for several years and one thing that is true of learning to play an instrument or write a book is the need for continual practice. I don’t play like I used to. My fingers still remember some of the harder pieces I learned because I practiced so much when I learned them. But I’m not as good at the songs as I once was for lack of playing those pieces.

If a teacher is trying to teach the class how to write a story or learn grammar or math or reading, she needs to be able to build on yesterday’s learning.

When I homeschooled for twelve years, I learned that each child had a different learning style. One was quick at math and needed to move ahead to challenge him. One hated to read, so I let him pick books that were fun for him. He actually reads the classics now.

I’m not trying to tell parents to homeschool their kids. That’s an individual decision, but it is an option. Some thoughts on homeschooling, whether you’re going it on your own or helping your child with online classes, here are some things to keep in mind.

1. Homeschooling is not easy. Nope. Not at all. Every Monday made us long for Friday.
2. Homeschooling takes dedication and a bit of stubbornness on the parent’s part to not give up. It gets better if you find creative ways to stay committed.
3. Homeschooling doesn’t take as long each day as traditional classes do. For younger children, you can finish your classes in half a day.
4. Homeschooling takes a lot of preparation. I read 1000 pages on the subject before day one. You have to know what to expect, but even then, you won’t know until you start.
5. Homeschooling is rewarding. Families can become friends. Not always, of course. But it can help to be together and learn together.
6. Homeschooling is easier if you keep good records and do lesson plans ahead of time – like the weekend before.
7. Homeschooling also works best when you include a lot of extra outside-of-school things to do. Being together 24/7 is trying for anyone. Let your kids create. Turn off the video games and the TV. Take away the phones and iPads. Let them play in the yard or with Legos. Take them on field trips wherever and whenever possible.

That’s just a small part of what we did. Every year I picked new curriculum for each child to fit their grade and learning needs. We took classes like karate, art, had gym class, music lessons, archery, church activities, and probably a lot more. It’s been a while!

The thing is, whatever you as a parent decide is best for your child or children, they will succeed best if you stay involved all through their school years. It’s a rare child that motivates themselves. But when you seek things they want to learn, that helps. We can’t possibly learn all there is to know in life, so sometimes we have to do the basics and then branch out into what they love. They’ll learn a lot more if they like what they’re learning. And as an aside: history is more fun if you make it about people rather than boring facts or dates. Some facts matter, but read biographies of real people. That brings history to life.

I hope this helps anyone who is struggling with what to do when schools or if schools open and you have to decide whether you like what you see there. I can’t tell anyone what to do and wouldn’t try. Was my homeschooling a success? Well…they all went on to get bachelor’s degrees and are really good at the work they do, but you’d have to ask them if they liked it or would homeschool their own kids. Not my decision.

I just know that the future isn’t what life used to be. At least not this year. As long as we face fear with restrictions, we’re going to have to adapt. I would pray and seek God’s leading. Then go with God.

~Selah

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